![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
I went to the dentist today, which meant forced small talk with the hygienist. I don't mind small talk per se, but in half an hour's time you wind up having to re-establish the basics every time, and my life is just slightly odd enough that I spend all that time correcting assumptions about my life rather than actually getting on with the, er, "meat" of the meaningless chatter.
"So are you on lunch?"
Assumes that I work an 8-5 job like most people (I work 12:30-9). I schedule all my appointments before work whenever possible.
"So how's your spring break?"
Assumes that this is spring break for me, which I guess it might be for semestered types, but De Anza is on quarters, which means spring break was two weeks ago.
"Where are you guys going to get married?"
Assumes we're going someplace unusual, which we're not.
"So it's just going to be at your guys's house?"
Um, sure, we'll run with that. Not that we have one, but it's easier than explaining further.
"What's your dress like?"
Assumes I have one at all, which I don't.
"So what is your fiance doing for work?"
Displays ignorance of the immigration system, i.e. assumes that as soon as he came in, he was legal, which is not true, because of the visa type he had. (Even if he'd had the type that confers immediate status, there would still be paperwork to do before he could actually start looking for work. H1B = job visa is something else again, but then you're not supposed to get married on that one! Oh INS/USCIS/DHS, never change.) I should not / do not expect people to know these details if they have not tangled with them, but it really gets annoying having to explain things over and over again.
"So are you having kids right away?"
Assumes either of us wanted any, which we don't.
"Where are you going on the honeymoon?"
Assumes that we are going to take off somewhere right afterwards, which my work schedule rather prevents. If we have such a celebratory trip it's going to be far enough distanced from the "wedding" (i.e., at least 3 1/2 months apart, because there are no more school breaks until the end of August) that it could hardly be called a "honeymoon".
...And by that time it's time for the dentist to come in and do the exam.
But I guess I should count my blessings: at least they've stopped asking me how I am doing in school. :P
"So are you on lunch?"
Assumes that I work an 8-5 job like most people (I work 12:30-9). I schedule all my appointments before work whenever possible.
"So how's your spring break?"
Assumes that this is spring break for me, which I guess it might be for semestered types, but De Anza is on quarters, which means spring break was two weeks ago.
"Where are you guys going to get married?"
Assumes we're going someplace unusual, which we're not.
"So it's just going to be at your guys's house?"
Um, sure, we'll run with that. Not that we have one, but it's easier than explaining further.
"What's your dress like?"
Assumes I have one at all, which I don't.
"So what is your fiance doing for work?"
Displays ignorance of the immigration system, i.e. assumes that as soon as he came in, he was legal, which is not true, because of the visa type he had. (Even if he'd had the type that confers immediate status, there would still be paperwork to do before he could actually start looking for work. H1B = job visa is something else again, but then you're not supposed to get married on that one! Oh INS/USCIS/DHS, never change.) I should not / do not expect people to know these details if they have not tangled with them, but it really gets annoying having to explain things over and over again.
"So are you having kids right away?"
Assumes either of us wanted any, which we don't.
"Where are you going on the honeymoon?"
Assumes that we are going to take off somewhere right afterwards, which my work schedule rather prevents. If we have such a celebratory trip it's going to be far enough distanced from the "wedding" (i.e., at least 3 1/2 months apart, because there are no more school breaks until the end of August) that it could hardly be called a "honeymoon".
...And by that time it's time for the dentist to come in and do the exam.
But I guess I should count my blessings: at least they've stopped asking me how I am doing in school. :P
