(no subject)

[arethinn]

A new entrant to Spinners--End just called me "kind and gentle".

Um.

I can only hope they don't often encounter me directly after this point (accepting their group join request). I mean, I don't try to be an ass, but it seems I often succeed in sticking my foot in my mouth and coming off insensitive or rude when I'm merely trying to correct someone on something factual (which I know intellectually is not something everyone appreciates, but which I find very, very hard to stop myself doing) or just trying to point out another possible point of view or an interesting-to-me detail someone might have missed even when I agree with their overall point. (Ravenclaw much?) Thus, the general effect of my personality is pretty much the opposite of kind and gentle, rather coming off critical and excessively negative.

This is somewhere between sorrowing and annoying, because to me certain kinds of criticisms or sarcasm are offers of friendship or at least intellectual engagement, and they're often rebuffed with the equivalent of "dude! aren't you some kind of bitch". Irony ensues because I have a hard time taking criticism myself, but it depends on the context and how it's phrased. Correcting me on something factual is usually a safe bet.

um. unintentional personality-revealment there. well, now you know.

Comments

[shalora.livejournal.com]

This is the exact same problem I get slammed up against on the forum boards on the sim games I play. I really wish there were some computer equivalent to tone of voice, body language, etc. I get so tired of being constantly accused of being mean, a know-it-all, mini-modding, etc. I had a streak of a few months where literally every time I posted, some twerp kid would get all butthurt and have spasms at me, up to and including posting new forum threads with titles like "Wolfkin is so mean, everyone needs to block her!". >:p

And of course I was doing horrible things like seeing some kind of deeply stupid idea on the suggestions board and posting something like:

"No support. This really isn't needed, and it would put a lot of strain on the server and slow the site down."

Clearly being a total bitch, personally attacking the OP, and generally completely intolerable behavior, right? Um, wait...

(especially frustrating when what I'd usually WANT to post would be along the lines of "omfg are you kidding me? This is a completely stupid and useless idea, I can't believe you even brought it up, and I hate you for doing so because now a bunch of other young twerps are going to get all excited about it and it will be weeks before we can shove it off the first page and get some of the real ideas back up" - except that I'd never actually say something like that)

Argh, 4 am rambling. But believe me when I say I TOTALLY sympathize.

[arcanetrivia]

Clearly being a total bitch, personally attacking the OP, and generally completely intolerable behavior, right?

Obviously.

[danodea.livejournal.com]

(which I know intellectually is not something everyone appreciates, but which I find very, very hard to stop myself doing)

:(
Yeah. I grok. I have that problem too.