"tests for husbands and wives"

[arethinn]

http://flickr.com/photos/tiabla/2491839696/in/set-72157605047200616/

LOLwut?

Seriously, look at each page at a larger size and read them. Some of the things (both "merits" and "demerits") are reasonable, but a lot of them are really ridiculous. And some confuse me just by their presence. From our chat window:

From "Husband's":

"fails to change socks often enough" wtf?
"dislikes to dress or shave on sunday" hey, if you want to go to church naked, it's fine with me
"does not use tobacco" wtf? this was a time when smoking was very much accepted
"writes on tablecloth with pencil" wtf???
"Ardent lover -- sees that wife has orgasm in marital congress" LOL that's worth 20 points!
"not a sissy" lol
"tries to keep wife equipped with modern labor saving devices" -- including ones that would contribute to "ardent lover"?
"gives wife real movie kisses not dutiful peck on the cheek" weird, since movie kisses in this time period are quite obviously fake

From "Wife's":
"slow in coming to bed -- delays till husband is almost asleep" lol, rite. because my duty is to give you sex, remember?
"wears red nail polish" wtf?
"puts her cold feet on husband to warm them" lol
"religious -- sends children to church or sunday school and goes herself" but also "lets husband sleep late on sundays". I guess you don't have to be religious
"uses slang or profanity" well fuck, I guess i suxx0r
"squeezes toothpaste at the top" wtf?
"tells risque or vulgar stories" so this one time at band camp...
"wears pajamas while cooking"??
"laughs at husbands jokes and his clowning" even if he's completely unfunny.
"has a pleasant disposition in the morning -- not crabby" yeah, that's going to happen
"reacts with pleasure and delight to marital congress" lol i just love the way that's phrased
"has spunk" well i suppose I will if I react with pleasure to marital congress
"wears pajamas instead of nightgown" wha?
"is snobbish or too much concerned with keeping up with the joneses" but on the last page, there was "encourages family to attain highly" or something
"often comments on husband's strength and masculinity" BAAAHAHAHAHA right. well, you have testicles and face fur. that's masculine enough for me
"has minor children to care for. 5 points per child" wtf just think about this for a second. "I am more pleased with my wife if she has children"?? are you not aware of where they would come from, pal?
"walks around house in stocking feet" see, i told you that was weird [I usually wear shoes in the house, whereas enotsola's habit has always been for socks only]

Comments

[twopiearr.livejournal.com]

pajamas = pants, less accessable

(i'm guessing)

[feyandstrange.livejournal.com]

Smoking was socially accepted, but wives often hated cleaning up after it.

Clearly I will make a lousy husband. Or wife, for that matter. My stocking seams are always crooked! Back to living in sin for me.

[starlightforest.livejournal.com]

I guess!

[waywind.livejournal.com]

I wear stocking feet around the house because it causes less of a hubbub when I happen to tread upon the cat.

[enotsola]

If you just didn't step on the cat, it wouldn't be an issue, would it?

[waywind.livejournal.com]

You haven't met my cat.

[lilyevans-snape.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the laugh. I think that I would fail as a wife if I had to live up to these standards... Actually, I know I would ;-)